Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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