It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize