Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
