dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Randomize
