I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize