And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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