Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize