I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
