is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
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