i think i have herpe
just one?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
