Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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