sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
