You made me cry and you don't even care
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Randomize
