Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
