Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
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