Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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