I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
