he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
