I must be too annoying 4 u.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
