My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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