so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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