bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
