if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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