if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Alive.
So much puke
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
