No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
