I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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