Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize