Walk of Shame. In a state park.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
