It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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