The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
