i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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