hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
