that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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