That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
