I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
