i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
