yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
