new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Randomize
