Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Randomize
