remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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