I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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