whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
