I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
