You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I wish you could order shots online.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
