babies were throwing up all over the place
Little spoons don't ask big questions
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
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