My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
