He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
