Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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