What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
