She is in my trunk
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
